as i got light as a feather they got stiff as a board. i can't feel anymore, but i can fake it forever.

I bought a bike today! How fun is that? I haven't ridden a bike since I was 12. I took a short ride around my apartment complex, and I must say that it's not as easy as I remember. Breaking in particular. But wish me luck on not breaking a leg!

i could put my arms around every boy i see, but they'd only remind me of you

I never gave an update on what I did during my Muncie weekend. Thanks, Christoph, for pointing this out. Though it's been several weeks this that fun-filled week-end, I shall inform you that I went to a great pancake house here in Muncie for the first time. Eva's House of Pancakes. Got tons of food--all delicious--on the cheap, and thought I'd be back many times. That is until teh following Tuesday, when I saw the restaurant had suddenly closed. I also went to a great Mexican place with a friend where the decor includes Precious Moments figures dressed as Mexicans, with sombreros, gouchos, and large moustaches. No word yet on the future of this place.

On another note altogether, I would normally post a response to Ginger's blog posting in the appropriate space (on her own blog), it inspired me to write things on my own blog. The blog entry was about Britain releasing the list of hate-mongers who are not allowed in their country anymore. Do read her entry. I found myself totally agreeing, and thinking of other ways that "open-minded" people are always hating on the hatemongers, thinking they are taking the high road while they preach equally outrageous hatred. For years, I have listened to other gay people talk about how closed-minded other people can be (and they can be) and they talk about these people's hatred and ignorance, but instead of setting a good example as a human being, they (and not all gay people) use vicious hate language about people who do not accept them, and refuse to see the hypocrisy in demanding that their opinion be heard and accepted when often that message is more hate-filled than the opposition (with some forgiveness because it does hurt sometimes to not be able to casually hold your boyfriend's hand and be told that your love is not valid, so of course you're going to be angry sometimes.) But for many of us, it took years to accept that we were homosexuals and be comfortable in our own skin, and some gay people never get that far. How can we expect others to accept us and love us for who we are, when instead of educating them and showing them what upstanding citizens we can be, we attack and demand acceptance? At the same time, I realize that sometimes you can't just sit back and wait for people to change their minds about things like gay marriage. But is demonizing someone like Miss California really part of the road to showing everyone that we are respectable and beneficial parts of society? She stated her opinion, which she is allowed to have, and while she sounded dumb, she's trying to be Miss America, not the president. By the way, most gay people supported Barack Obama whole-heartedly. A president who opposed gay marriage. Are people really more upset that a beauty queen does not support gay marriage? Really?

all i ever wanted was a simple way to get over you

Let me first apologize for my absense. It's not you. It's me.

I have become a Mafia Wars addict. Mafia Wars is a game on facebook where I get to live out my fantasized Italian heritage of being a New York Italian mafia man. I've made it to the level of Hitman at last count. It's very exciting.

This weekend is my first weekend off work that I'm spending in Muncie in months. Sorry for the awkward sentence structure on that last sentence. I don't feel like rearranging the prepositional phrases. But I wonder what awaits me this weekend. Will I take advantage of the great weather and explore Ball State tomorrow? Will I take a stroll along the river? I'll let you know.

poetry is no place for a heart that's a whore

"What must their most secret prayers be like, these men who pray and prey and pray and prey? Do they live in anguish? They cause it, but do they live in it? In my most secret prayers I pray they do, even as I pray to be able to forgive them. To forgive him." --Kevin Sessums, Mississippi Sissy.

Note to self: you changed your windshield wiper blades today. According to the packaging, check them again in six months for nicks or cuts and replace as needed. Do not forget.

my best friend told me you're the best lick in town

Do they still do shout-outs on the radio? I don't listen to a lot of radio these days, but I remember some great shout-outs coming through the speakers years ago. I hope they still do that.

I moved into my apartment in late October, and when it came time to decorate for Christmas a month later, I didn't feel like it, since I wasn't even finished doing my primary decorating. But now the primary decorating is done, and Chistmas is upon us, and I feel bad that I ignored my festive things this year, and I fear that in a couple months, I will regret not taking the time to decorate and I may feel that I let time slip through my hands. Is that a reason to finally decorate only a couple days before Christmas, knowing that I will need to undecorate just a few days later? Do I have the energy for that? Do I have the energy to not do it?

i wanna go to heaven for the weather and hell for the company

I overslept this morning, and it just got worse from there. I didn't oversleep so much that I was late to work, but just enough to put that pit in your stomach that makes you feel rushed and uneasy all day.

So I moved to Muncie six weeks ago after accepting a job that I had wanted to do for years, that I cut off my life two years ago to go back to school to be able to do and put myself in a heap more debt to be able to do, and I enjoy the job (most days--though today was not one of them.) But when I moved here, I gave up a lot of the things and people I love, and today that feels really bad. Hopefully tomorrow it will feel more acceptable. I'm just having a bad day.

who needs love when there's southern comfort?

I thought I would give you an update on that empty corner in my living room that I blogged about when last I blogged: it's still there.

With the Thanksgiving holiday upon us, I wanted to announce the winner of my Thanksgiving-Related Film Awards Best Picture: The Ice Storm. Many quotable quotes, great costumes, icy acting (the good kind of icy), and Christina Ricci trying to get it on while wearing a Nixon mask. If only my own holiday celebrations could be so successful. If you loathe family holidays like I do, you'll love this movie. (A quick shout-out to Gene Shallot for inspiring my wordplay there.)

Happy Thankgiving!

i cannot run from my family, they're hiding inside of me

Many of you have asked how Muncie is working out, so I thought I would blog about my experience so far to calm the masses. My new job is going well, and living here is going just fine. I went out last weekend with some college students to a bar close to campus on Halloween and had a nice time just hanging out and trying to to feel too much older than them. I was in a college bar and didn't get carded, so that was pretty difficult, especially since the guy in front of me who looked about 45 got carded. I'm almost over it now though.

But Muncie isn't so bad. It's small and contained, and has most of the things I need within close proximity. My drive to work is along the river, and is especially pretty as the sun is setting with the fall-leaved trees lining the street.

I'm still trying to figure out how to put the furniture in my living room. I had everything set up, but a large corner of the room was filled with unpacked boxes, and as I unpack them, I realize more and more that I did not factor this third of the room into my decorating plan. But I'm being positive and telling myself that now I get to decorate twice. Yea!

now feel the fever as i leave you wanting more

So apparently I'm moving to Muncie. Home of Ball State University. I have trouble saying that without giggling. Does that make me immature?

I bought The Ting Ting's "We Started Nothing" album a few days ago. If you like euro-garage-noise pop, you'll love this album. I know you all do. To find out if you'll enjoy it, find 3 CD players (or record players for you, Christoph) and put Toni Basil's "Mickey" on repeat, as well as The White Stripes and Garbage, and play all three of those competing sounds at the same time. If that makes you sing along and dance, then you may like The Ting Tings.

I just re-read this recommendation and I realize now why Rolling Stone didn't hire me to write album reviews. I apologize for the hate mail.

and if you take him back, i'm gonna lose my nerve

Last night, I got home from work and there was a cat on my balcony. Normally, this wouldn't deserve a blog entry, but this case is special. I first heard said cat crying loudly and looked out to see that it had climbed about 5 feet high on the screen. Meanwhile, my own cat Tuesday was going crazy, hissing and whatnot. After a minute or so (are you visualizing with me or just reading?) said skinny gray cat climbed down and opened the screen with its un-de-clawed paw and tried to run inside. Was this cat hiungry, crazy, or love-starved? I didn't care to find out. I managed to grab the cat and put it back outside, closing the glass door, hoping the cat was not strong enough to open this door as it did the screen. I decided that if the cat was hungry, I could not deny it some food and water, so I tried to put some outside for it, but the cat would have none of it. Gray, as I will call him or her, got his or her head inside before I could close the door, so I was stuck trying to get the cat's head out without allowing the rest of the cat to get back inside, in which I was not successful. You probably think that this cat was acting wildly when he or she got inside, but you'd be wrong. Perfect lady/gentleman. So I got it back outside, and tried to forget the whole thing happened, though my Tuesday was still crouched in a corner hissing. End of a pointless story? Not yet.

For the next couple hours, it sounded like I was involved in a cat horror movie. Gray (did you forget I named the cat Gray? I did.) screamed and wailed and ran his or her claws along the window as if this cat was Freddy Krueger teasing me before coming inside to kill me. I managed to get the food and water out the second time without having Gray get his or her head inside my apartment, relieving some of my misplaced guilt. At some point in the night, Gray must have gone away, but the food I was able to put outside was eaten, so I hope that helped. Cat terrorism must end. Do your part, and hopefully they will leave us alone.